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December 19, 2017

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My Toast with Sparkling Grape Juice

August 27, 2017

If I could have your attention, I would like to make a quick toast to a very very important person. If it weren’t for you I wouldn’t be where I am today. You know every dream I’ve had and every goal I’ve committed myself to doing. Even better, in the previous years you’ve watched every single one of those dreams come to pass. There was one thing on my list I always talked to you about, and that was getting married. I know we always talked about my career, my friends, my family, my church, and my education, but my husband was different. After we talked about my problems, it never failed, things would change and I could see things working out in my favor. However, I still hoped and waited for my husband with no physical evidence of his arrival.  This seemed to be one area of my life that wasn't going in my favor. You did reassure me a couple years ago when you woke me up around 2 am and reminded me that “The promise still stands.” That gave me hope and faith, but we all know how the waiting game goes. It has a way of testing your endurance level. I was uplifted, but I grew weary waiting. Actually, I grew tired of waiting. Most of my friends were married, engaged, or at least dating, but I couldn’t seem to meet one single guy that was on the same page as me or me on the same page as him. Either I didn’t like them, they didn’t like me, we couldn’t get along, they weren’t down with celibacy or they didn’t want a relationship or commitment. Any way you name it, it wasn't working for me. 

 

At some point in my singleness I remember telling you I was through with dating and If I didn’t see marriage potential then I wasn’t committing myself to a relationship. No more jumping in head first hoping it will magically work its self out. I was at a point in my life where I wanted the real deal.

 

The reasons for failure in my dating life were infinite and weren’t always because of the other person. Although there were plenty of reasons why things didn't work out because of the other person, you knew more than anyone that there were still moments it didn't work out because of me and my way of thinking.  So, I went  a painstaking 4 years being single.  I would meet guys every now and then, but none of them ever became a boyfriend, so I was truly convinced I would meet my husband when I was much older than I am now. I didn't see it happening any time soon, which brought me down at times because I wanted to experience true love. Through the tears, the let downs, and heart breaks YOU were always there! YOU always saw my heart when others couldn't.

 

Towards the end of my 4 year journey you began to talk very directly to me pertaining  to my singleness and my future. Although, I had grown weary I never gave up and after our talks I would have a little more motivation to keep walking. You started to show me what really mattered in a marriage. Why looks aren’t everything and why the heart and spirit of a man are so important. You explained to me why I had to step out side the box and not put limits on what YOU could do. You told me to surrender to your will and once I was obedient to you what I’ve been wanting will come to pass. So, I did some spring cleaning. I removed somethings from my life… some thoughts, people, and habits. I chose to be obedient although it was extremely hard. The hardest thing I had to do was getting rid of my ideas of my type and what I wanted. I had to give up my will for yours. Not long after my spring cleaning you told me very clearly that EVERYTHING around me was about to change. Everything, from my education status, my location, and yes, my marital status. Something inside of me ignited! I knew without a doubt things were finally about to shift in my favor! You spoke those words to me in the winter of 2015.

 

On December 20, 2015 I decided to go on Match.com after much prayer. You reassured me it was ok so I proceeded. You put in my spirit the type of guy I needed in my life, which was a simple guy, not a flashy one. Not the guy who is super fine and dressed like a man out of GQ Magazine, although those things are very pleasing to the eye that was not the man for me. The man I needed was a man of God, who enjoys the simple things in life, loves to smile, and is just a regular guy like my dad and brother. That is exactly what I saw in my husband that day. I asked you first Lord, what I should do. You assured me it was ok to make my presence known. So, I sent a wink to the man who caught my inner eye.  I was careful to not be too forward. I waited patiently for several hours for him respond or wink back. I started getting anxious, so I talked to you about it. I remember saying to you, “Lord, I guess it wasn’t meant for me to talk to him”  because it was taking him so long to write back. I created my profile on Match.com under a free 1 day trial and I had no intention to stay online another day.

 

The clock was winding down and It was getting late and at that moment, YOU stepped in. You spoke to my husband while he laid in bed on his way to sleep. You spoke to him and told him to get up and to check his email. His phone was charging on the dresser, and checking his email required him to physically get out of the bed. He was slow to move, but he was obedient. Lord, I thank you for loving me so much to bring your promise to pass. You told me the promise still stands, and here I am married to the man you designed for me. Not the man I picked for myself, but the man you picked for me. So this toast is to you. For answering prayers, for making a way, for filling my heart, and for your grace. You never left my side and you have never let me down. You deserve a standing ovation because you showed out again! So everyone lift your glasses, your hands, and your voices and give our Lord, Savior, and Creator of everything praise for being GREAT! Praise Him for what he is doing in your life right now. We can’t always see what He is up to, but be assured He hears you and is putting it all together. It just takes time… Just wait for it.  They that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint (Isaiah 40:31).

 

This is my toast to Jesus! (i.e. with sparkling grape juice)

 

Love,

if He did it for me He will do it for you 

 

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